The Art of the Negotiation: My Latest Prop Bet with Adam Levitan

If you listen to the Three Donkeys podcast, well, I mean, you’re probably kind of a loser to be honest. But you also know that Peter, Levitan, and I – along with a big group of gamblers and personalities (Brandon Adams, Joe Ingram, Scott Blumstein, Sleeze, Manz, and Barstool Smitty, among others) are going to compete in a Gambling Olympics in Vegas in about a month. We’ll be gambling on everything from poker to sportsbetting to rock-paper-scissors to Connect 4 to beer pong, competing to win gold, with tons of side bets already shaping up.

One of those side bets was finalized the other day, as I booked 5-1 to against Levitan – my $1k to his $5k – on the 6-12-18-24 challenge. For those unfamiliar, this means jacking off, drinking beer, eating donuts, and running miles – assigning each of 6, 12, 18, or 24 to each task – in 24 hours. As of now, I will be running six miles, masturbating 12 times, eating 18 donuts, and drinking 24 beers.

We had a previous winner of the challenge on the podcast to talk a little strategy, and it was fucking hilarious.


I’ll probably talk about my approach heading into the challenge – an event so prestigous I hear they’re considering it for the real Olympics – but for now, I just wanted to post my negotiation with Levitan, which was completed in Slack, to give you guys an idea of how these things (sometimes, sort of) come to be.


The Negotiation

jonathan.bales [12:48 PM]
what odds are you guys giving me on 6-12-18-24? you said 10 to 1 levi? I think that’s fair :slightly_smiling_face:

adam.levitan [12:49 PM]
i said nothing.. let’s nail down the official rules.. all your miles have to be under 10 minutes and outside?

jonathan.bales [12:49 PM]
I mean whatever you want
that’s clearly way harder and a potential problem though
10 min is actually hard to do for possibly 12 miles
I mean it’s almost a half marathon

adam.levitan [12:50 PM]
oh i assumed you were running 6

jonathan.bales [12:50 PM]
idk if I can JO 12 times after some practice
yeah I mean I am gonna have to but I’m running out of steem on these JOs

adam.levitan [12:53 PM]
if you’re running outside and averaging a 10-minute mile while running them consecutively i can give you 6-1… but I’m not going to give you a lot of action on it, can’t let you beat me for like 30k

jonathan.bales [12:53 PM]
consecutive? that’s way different
don’t think I can do that at all
I assumed I could take a break after each mile

peter.jennings [12:54 PM]
Im on bales side

adam.levitan [12:54 PM]
well then i don’t see why you couldn’t do it
you’re in way better shape than the dude who came on the pod and did it
and you drink every day
doughnuts are easy
just gotta get the jerks done and you’ll have freedman to help you there

jonathan.bales [12:56 PM]
I don’t drink every day for the last time levi

adam.levitan [12:56 PM]

jonathan.bales [12:56 PM]
if you think 18/24 beers/donuts is easy then idk
and either miles or JOs or both gonna be hard af too
I think I am equipped to do it more than avg person but I think I’m likely to fail

adam.levitan [12:57 PM]
i mean if you take 20 minutes off between each mile it’ll be easy

jonathan.bales [12:57 PM]
even if you remove that, there’s some decent chance I can’t physically do 12 JOs

adam.levitan [12:57 PM]
for sure

jonathan.bales [1:00 PM]
so you’d do 6 to 1 if I ran it straight, no stops at all?
like if I fail then I just start back at 0 miles?
trying to think of how much easier it is to stop and what that equates to in a line if 6 to 1 is fair for that

adam.levitan [1:00 PM]
you’d have to average a 10-minute mile for whole thing.. so if you do 6 miles you have 60 minutes total from start to finish

jonathan.bales [1:01 PM]
there’s almost 0% chance I can complete six miles right now
I’ve literally never run two miles

adam.levitan [1:01 PM]
yeah well if the running isn’t hard i don’t see how you fail really
unless your dick fails you

jonathan.bales [1:02 PM]
he’s good for six easy
he starts to get ornery at seven
idk how you think 18/24 beers/donuts is just a given
that’s so hard
and in conjunction with running and jacking off
will take 6 to 1 my $1k if I can stop once running
5 to 1*

adam.levitan [1:06 PM]
if you do the total distance across total time you can stop as many times as you want

jonathan.bales [1:06 PM]
need a break. can’t do six miles in 60 min
will do two segments of three in 30
it is fucking Vegas in summer man it is gonna be literally 120

adam.levitan [1:07 PM]
i can give you 3.5/1 on that, but i’m not happy about it and only doing it for the #content

jonathan.bales [1:08 PM]
like it might not even be safe

adam.levitan [1:08 PM]
don’t be a pussy
death is one of the outcomes, yes

jonathan.bales [1:08 PM]
i’d do 6 to 1 on one hour before 3.5 with a break
outside is just bananas
i won’t be able to breathe

adam.levitan [1:09 PM]
the only way i’ll win is if you fail at the running
so yes, i’d be rooting for “unable to breathe”

jonathan.bales [1:09 PM]
i’ll die for content, it’s fine

adam.levitan [1:10 PM]
yeah i felt like this in 3rd set of frying pan match
you’re so hot you get the chills

jonathan.bales [1:10 PM]
that was fucking denver

adam.levitan [1:10 PM]
it was like 90 but i know.. Vegas is asking for death
that’s how i want to win (edited)

jonathan.bales [1:11 PM]
I will do 6 to 1, six miles in 66 minutes

adam.levitan [1:12 PM]

jonathan.bales [1:12 PM]
yeah. and I honestly think this is gonna be a disaster because I can barely finish one mile in under 10…ran the other day

adam.levitan [1:13 PM]
do you have to run during the day?

jonathan.bales [1:14 PM]
what time range is acceptable. clearly I’m running at night if I can

adam.levitan [1:15 PM]
ugh i dunno man.. i don’t want to bet against you in physical activities
nighttime temps in july in vegas average 79 degrees
nice running weather

jonathan.bales [1:15 PM]
the last mile bet I had I ran a half mile
this isn’t lifting

adam.levitan [1:16 PM]
we won’t be able to film your death if you do it at night

jonathan.bales [1:16 PM]
I will do it when light out
idk how I am gonna set it up exactly…need to think about it and what is best in terms of when I start, when I am trying to run, etc
my lean was I’d drink and eat at night, sleep, drink maybe 1/2 in morning and run then
I can’t wait too long strategically or else I have to run after eating and drinking too much. there’s just no way

adam.levitan [1:18 PM]
are you allowed to get more action? Like if you can win 5 BTC instead of 2/3 BTC you’ll obv train harder

jonathan.bales [1:18 PM]
I am gonna try obv….I’d be fine reducing our odds if I get more though
like each 10k to win interval I go down a point or something…
I will do whatever you want on that b/c you are right I will actually try if I get a bunch of action…I just doubt I will

adam.levitan [1:20 PM]
OK i’ve wasted enough of this day.. let me think about it

jonathan.bales [1:20 PM]
comee onnnnn gimme something. have to get this booked

adam.levitan [1:21 PM]
freedman verification on jerks?

jonathan.bales [1:21 PM]
I mean obv

adam.levitan [1:21 PM]
no live women in room obv, even for fluffing

jonathan.bales [1:21 PM]
for that I will have a room that is inspected before and I will produce sample each itme
yeah no women OR MEN

adam.levitan [1:21 PM]
no cam girls either… no human interaction

jonathan.bales [1:21 PM]
I can watch porn right

adam.levitan [1:21 PM]

jonathan.bales [1:22 PM]
donuts will be standard glazed

adam.levitan [1:22 PM]

jonathan.bales [1:23 PM]
krispy kreme glazed I thought was standard

adam.levitan [1:23 PM]
beers minimum 5% ABV?

jonathan.bales [1:23 PM]
no way….standard miller lite bud light whatever
those are just under 5 arent they?

adam.levitan [1:24 PM]
coors light is like water, think it’s 4

jonathan.bales [1:24 PM]
the other two main ones are 4.2
normal cans of lite beer

adam.levitan [1:25 PM]
no funnels?

jonathan.bales [1:25 PM]
8 oz beers

adam.levitan [1:25 PM]
no shotgunning

jonathan.bales [1:25 PM]
no funnels, drink from can

adam.levitan [1:25 PM]
8oz? you mean 12oz

jonathan.bales [1:26 PM]
yeah I guess
whatever like a normal looking can is
yeah 12
looked it up
6 miles in 66 min, has to be during day, unlimited breaks, 12 oz lite beers, krispy kreme glazed donuts, produce semen 12 times
only other contingency I can think of is vomit

adam.levitan [1:29 PM]
OK i’ll give you 5-1 given the 66 minutes but you have to run between 9am and 6pm… if you sell more than 10k worth of additional potential winnings that goes to 2.5-1
yeah i think vomiting is tough because once you puke you can drink so much more beer

jonathan.bales [1:30 PM]
right. clearly purposely vomiting is out. I see a very high chance of puking while running though and that would stink if I was DQed on that
like what if it’s just a little tiny vomit

adam.levitan [1:30 PM]
are you going to drink any beers at all before running?

jonathan.bales [1:31 PM]
since I am running in the morning presumably, I would like a contingency that I can vomit while running or up to 15 min after, but no other time during the competition. I’d also like to be able to purposely puke at the end once it is clear I finished and am not involuntarily vomiting

adam.levitan [1:32 PM]

jonathan.bales [1:32 PM]
and idk on the beers but it would be like 1-2 and maybe one donut before at max
idk though…might just do nothing and run it right away

adam.levitan [1:32 PM]
you are going to take the full 24 hrs right? so there are 2 mornings, presumably

jonathan.bales [1:33 PM]
there will be just one if I start at night which I think I will
also better for content if I am finishing at like 8pm or something

adam.levitan [1:33 PM]
yeah so you’re going to jerk, drink, eat.. go to sleep.. wake up and run and then finish
god this is so easy if you can do the run
we’re basically betting on the run, that’s it

jonathan.bales [1:34 PM]
can you jack off 12 times in a day? no. eat 18 donuts and drink 24 beers or vice versa? no

adam.levitan [1:34 PM]
i can do 6 a day
i can easily do donuts

jonathan.bales [1:34 PM]
I need to do 12 though

adam.levitan [1:34 PM]
i can’t drink the beer but you def can
nah 6 jerks before sleep, 6 jerks across next day

jonathan.bales [1:34 PM]
six jerks before sleep come on

adam.levitan [1:35 PM]
one an hour for six hours?
then sleep for 6 hours

jonathan.bales [1:35 PM]
a good portion of jerks are gonna have to come after drinking
gonna be a real issue
6 to 1 and I cannot drop to 2.5 to 1 becuase that pretty much means I can’t even get other action
oh I see…I could get 9k more?
6 to 1 and 3 to 1 on that and it is booked

adam.levitan [1:37 PM]
not giving 6-1, it’s too easy
will give 5-1 for the content
but still think it’s a bad bet

jonathan.bales [1:38 PM]
5 to 1 and 68 min

adam.levitan [1:38 PM]
can’t do it.. failing the run is my only shot

jonathan.bales [1:38 PM]
and I want to clarify the vomiting proposal is fine?
5.5 to 1 then and that’s it
66 min
fuck it, it’s $500…5 to 1 is fine who cares

adam.levitan [1:40 PM]
so you’re saying you can vomit during the run? But you can’t vomit up a bunch of beer and doughnuts

jonathan.bales [1:40 PM]
yes that is correct…I don’t want to be DQed running in that heat and puking but the spirit isn’t to be able to puke up a bunch of beer and donuts
I do want to be able to puke once I finish, however
why don’t we do 2 beer and 2 donut max pre-running
although I almost certainly won’t be eating two donuts for sure

adam.levitan [1:42 PM]
ok that’s fine.. 2 beers and 2 donut max within 2 hrs of run
then you can puke.. but if you do complete the run, you can’t puke again rest of day

jonathan.bales [1:45 PM]
six miles in 66 minutes, unlimited breaks and able to puke up no more than two donuts and two beers from within two-hour window if I do happen to vomit during the run or within 15 minutes of it. otherwise no vomit until last task completed. 12 jackoffs that are produced in a semen-free room. 18/24 beers/donuts. 12 oz lite beers and standard glazed krispy kreme donuts. 5 to 1 on $1k and goes to 3 to 1 if I get more than $10k of additional to-win action.

adam.levitan [1:45 PM]
ugh fine.. it’s booked just for the lulz

jonathan.bales [1:46 PM]

And that, my friends, is the art of the negotiation.